"The most interesting people you'll find are ones that don't fit into your average cardboard box. They'll make what they need. They'll make their own boxes." - Dr. Temple Grandin

Team Independence is a group of Autism Parents & Educators from Independence Elementary School in Weldon Spring, Mo. We are raising funds to support, uplift and empower our incredible kids, who deserve opportunities to thrive and live their best lives. 

I will be walking in honor of both of my incredible boys, Otto and Wolf, who are like night and day in personality - one an introvert, one an extrovert - yet both happen to fall on the autism spectrum. 

Our journey with autism began with the diagnosis of my first born, Otto James Payne in 2017, just before his third birthday. Prior to that and very early on, there were indications that Otto was 'different' and marched to the beat of his own drum. Otto was born beautiful, intelligent and independent, even as a toddler. He had a fascination with letters, numbers, characters, symbols, buttons, lights, computers (learning how to navigate an iPad at just 18 months old) and anything visually intricate or pleasing. When his brother John "Wolf" came along, Otto had a hard time with the loudness and unexpected nature of another small child in the home and often avoided or ignored him. Unlike most other toddlers/preschool kids his age, Otto wanted nothing to do with peer play, holding his brother, following the group nor "using his words." Otto wanted to do things his own way, which we saw as an intrinsic personality quirk, but also noticed he was struggling to communicate his wants and needs in a functional way. Mother's intuition, secondary opinions from trusted relatives and early intervention therapists motivated us to seek answers. 

In the year after Otto was diagnosed, we noticed that Wolf was also struggling to find his words, started having frequent temper tantrums, struggled with certain food and accessory textures and gained a big of a "stim" (stimulating action) - he engaged in repetitive hand movements (which we affectionately now refer to as reindeer hands). Wolf loved watching, reading or listening to his favorite things over and over and over...including the family favorite, Gangham Style. However, Wolf was super SOCIAL. He loved making new friends, playing with others, parroting gestures and sounds and visiting new places. With little knowledge about the wide spectrum of personalities who also happen to have autism, we were in denial about his neurodivergence. In time and with more education about the autistic experience we realized that Wolf was also struggling - and needed speech and occupational support to help him thrive. We sought an evaluation and learned he too was on the spectrum. 

Parenting children with developmental differences such as autism is both the hardest and best thing I could have hoped for. Every milestone achieved - in its own time - is hard-won and ever the more beautiful. Every milestone not achieved reminds us we are not in control and there is grace in acceptance - and this lesson cannot be learned without adversity. I am grateful for parenting on a road less traveled because it has molded me into the mom I am today - less selfish, more present and focused on what matters. As a former people-pleaser and "keeping up with the Joneses" person in recovery, Otto and Wolf have taught me the true meaning of patience, humility, authenticity and above all, LOVE. During my lifetime I will do everything I can to support, uplift and meet my boys where they are - magnifying their unique gifts and surrounding them with resources that alleviate their challenges/disabilities in other areas. 

It’s only through the dedicated support of people like us that Autism Speaks can continue their vital mission work to support people with autism. Each year, the Autism Speaks Autism Response Team makes direct contact with tens of thousands of individuals looking for advice or guidance and more than one million people access their free nationwide autism services and resources. They continue to partner and support research to improve the lives of people with autism by investing in science that will allow more personalized treatments and therapies. You can find out even more about where your fundraising dollars go at autismspeaks.org/our-work.

Please join us by donating to help us reach our fundraising goal. Together, we have the power to enhance the lives of people with autism and make a meaningful difference. Thanks so much for your support!